So I was walking home Friday night, slowly and in no rush, when we see this little old lady walking her tiny, tiny puppy. Some huge lady runs up, grabs the dog and runs off. Quickly, giving no thought to my own safety, I launch my umbrella at her like a Ninja Star. She goes down, freeing the puppy. But she's not down for long. She jumps up, charges toward me and I stick out my foot to trip her. She takes me down with her and I fall on my face. She, however, is knocked out unconscious on the sidewalk and I walk away.
It was a bar fight. Some chick was hitting on my man and I beat her up, but not before she got a couple of good swings in.